What's been going on in my life is crazy, but the latest event will shock you.

March Madness

It started out lovely.  Mother’s birthday 2/24 was celebrated the next day, on Friday.  She opened her cards and presents at the home.  She tried on her new birthday outfit and we took her out to dinner at a Mexican restaurant.  Afterwards, we went back to her house and watched a video, “Heroes.”  It was a really enjoyable birthday and it was good to see her so happy.

The car accident

The following Wednesday, 3/2, Mother had plans to hang out with a newish friend, Carol.  She had met Carol through her ex-coworker and good friend Norma.  Carol was driving them to an antiques store on 15th.  They headed North on Memorial and when they got to 15th, Carol pulled up into the intersection to turn left.  She didn’t have a green arrow.  When she saw her light turn yellow she still didn’t have a shot to turn.  Then it turned red.  She quickly turned left and a North-to-South bound car hit them broadside on my Mother’s passenger door going 40 mph.
Carol was fine, but my mother was rushed to the hospital.  I got the call at work from my Dad and then I called my sister.  We met at the St. Francis emergency room, where they only let us in lone at a time.  That felt so ominous.  The doctor said that she had broken ribs and that her lung had been punctured.  The lung was partially deflated and that a CT scan would show them the degree.  After the CT scan, they decided to put a chest tube in her.  The tube runs in under the arm pit and goes directly to the lung.  It inflates the lung, as well as drains any fluids.  The next day she was in a recovery room doped up on morphine.  She said her arm hurt really bad and she couldn’t lift it.  During her stay at the hospital, she improved as she was finally able to get out of bed, sit in a chair and walk around the floor with her oxygen.  She was in too much pain though to do much else.  The doctors knew of her shoulder pain but didn’t address it because it wasn’t part of the life-saving measures that they were focusing on.   Before Mom came home, I went to her house to feed the kitties and saw that the house was a wreck.  I cleaned it up for 3 hours and tried to make it nice for her when she came home.  On Monday, 3/7, she was sent home.  A hospital bed and oxygen were ordered for her as well as occasional physical therapist to help her work her sore shoulder.  The therapist in the hospital had told her that she’d need to do as much exercise as possible with that shoulder.  But the shoulder hurt too much.  She couldn’t even get out of that bed.  So I had to stay with her the first night so that I could help her get out of the bed to go to the restroom.  She managed to pull herself up using her good arm and the rail and felt better.  Tuesday afternoon, I visited her again.  I did laundry, cooked, cleaned, took the trash out, and fed the kitties.  I was exhausted.  At midnight my brother in law, Jon, called telling me that mother was back in the hospital.

The hospital…again

Jon and Melanie had been visiting Mother Tuesday evening after I left and Mother had noticed her left leg was looking swollen.  It got cold then numb.  She was terrified that she was having a stroke.  She called a nurse at the ER who advised her to come in.  I was grateful that Jon was with her because I was completely spent and had no energy to get out bed.  Jon said that she was being tested for blood clots.  The next morning I called Mom and she said that they had done an excruciatingly painful procedure on her leg vein to check to clots, but found none.  The other tests were also negative.  They were keeping her there for observation in case she had an infection.  During that morning, mother had slid down in her bed and couldn’t move.  She was in a room by herself.  She couldn’t reach the call button because it was on the side of the injured shoulder.  She had tried to reach for it anyways and felt that she had done more damage to her shoulder.  She knew something was wrong.  They didn’t come for a long time either.   She was desperate to leave and they finally gave the ok at 2pm to go. Mother called me at work, but I couldn’t leave so I called Jon.  He and Mel both declined to help.   I was terribly disappointed and called Mother back to tell her I’d be there at 4:30.  When I walked in the room, she was sitting in the corner, crying crocodile tears.  It broke my heart.  I helped her get the heck out of there and we went back home.  When we got there, Mel and Jon had been there, eating.  There were dirty dishes on the floor that Mother couldn’t reach and dishes on the counter that hadn’t been rinsed.  Dried pea soup….ick.   Also, Mother’s birthday cake had been taken out of the freezer and was sitting half eaten and open on the counter.  I had to throw it away.  I also had to clean.

Things started to return to normal during the week.  Tuesday she went to an Orthopedist who told her that her collar bone was broken.  He put her in a splint and told her to NOT move her arm for a few weeks.  Why didn’t Saint Francis address that?  Anyway, I was still having to come over each day to pick up the mail, feed the kitties, take out the trash, and do her shopping.  But she was doing better.  I however, was a wreck.

The death

I have been working over time for several weeks now.  So much, that even with the time off taken for Mom, I still came out ahead.  At work, there’s a huge re-organization that is stemming right from my area.  Basically instead of just Underwriting (screening applications and approving/denying them) all the new applications, we will be doing the entire process.  Several other offices did these tasks and it will all be on us now. We will enter them on the computer, scan them, screen them, make the phone calls, do the underwriting, and type the letters, waiver cards, and send out the membership packets.  Just us 4.  It has been hell at work and all this is launching April 1st.   That being said….

Saint Patrick’s Day:  I was working away when at 2pm Jon called, crying. He said that his mother had just passed away.  “Go get Mel.”  When it rains, it pours, right?
Jon’s mother had been diagnosed with Cancer last October and from about January to March she really went downhill.  Jon’s niece was taking care of her, but Jon was spending about every other day with her.  I picked up Melanie and we went over there. At the house were hospice people, a pastor, family, and friends.  Melanie and I went in there to say goodbye to her.  It was weird. I’ve never seen a dead person before.  She looked really peaceful.  Her eyes were slightly open and her mouth had a slight smile.  Apparently the night before was a different story.  She had been up all night, moaning horribly and other things unmentionable.  There was lots of crying going on and after the funeral home took her away, there seemed to be a little more relief.  But it was hard even then, to see her taken away like that.

After some dinner I suggested to Melanie that we go visit Mom.  I had promised her the day before that I’d come over and help.  It would also give us an emotional break from the sadness.  Mom kept me busy while Mel sat on the couch.  I was doing the usual cat feeding, dishes, and trash duty as well as other little tasks.

I drove Mel home, but not before stopping at Reesors so she could drop off some videos and pick up some food.  I was dead tired.  I told Mel that I had to hurry – it was getting near 10 pm and my body was sure to shut down soon.


The mugging

But wait...there's more.  So it was about 10 pm that I was finally pulling into my apartment complex after that long afternoon.  I had noticed a car with its lights turned off pulling in from the other side but dismissed it. I got out of my car and started walking up the sidewalk when I heard a car door slam and feet running.  I turned my head and these two guys were coming at me.   One stayed farther back.  This one came up to me was wearing a blue hooded sweatshirt with the hood on his head.  He said, "give me your purse!"  I didn’t think it was real…I mean how could it be…I just stood there for a moment and I said something like "oh c'mon..."  He then pulled out a gun and put it up to my upper arm and said, "give me the purse, bitch!!!" I was so scared!!!!!!!!! I held my arm out so he could pull it off my shoulder and he ran away and they drove off.  I stood there in shock, then jolted to the parking lot to try to see the car but only got a glimpse of the color, not the make or model.  I went back to the sidewalk screaming, “Daddy!!!  Daddy!!!!”  I was right underneath our balcony…why couldn’t he hear me!  “Daddy!!!”  I ran around the sidewalk to our stairs and up to our door.  I walked in crying, “I’ve just been mugged!”  “What?” he said, “I’ve just been MUGGGGEEEEDD!”  He called the police and they asked him questions, which I was too shaken up to answer.  After that I immediately called the bank to cancel my account and debit card.  While the policeman was at my place, those guys hit the place across the street and then two others...all about 11 minutes apart.  They did it that way so that the police would be too busy to get the job done.  Meanwhile, some suspects were being gathered and the police officer asked me to go with him to some locations and see if I could make an identification.  I went with him but none of the guys were the robbers.  I could see his laptop computer monitor and he showed me how mine was the first call and then the calls that came in right after mine.  He was describing where they were located.  He was sooo nice and I was very glad that he walked me to my door.

Meanwhile, I lost my purse and all that was in it.  My phone was the biggest loss to me.  The bank cancelled my bank card and my account so that they couldn't do anything.  I lost my drivers license and insurance, glasses, id badge from work and some cosmetics.  I was able to get a new license and insurance after work today.  I'll have to wait on the phone – I just can’t afford it.

I thought if I slept I'd be ok, so I took something to sleep.  I did sleep well.  But then today I felt really strange!  I felt really foggy and out of it and ill, and strangely really weak.  I couldn't concentrate or put two sentences together.  I called a counselor at the Employee Assistance Program and she said that I had post traumatic stress.  That going and seeing that dead person and then going over to my Mom's and dealing with her crisis and then getting mugged at gunpoint was like an emotional whiplash, and that I just shut down.

So I feel really krappy right now.  I just want my life back!!!!!!  I went to bed last night at 8:30 and woke up this morning at 8:30  Today I’m going to go to a lunch at a predominantly Indian church. It’s called a Wild Onion fest, and there will be lots of native american food.  Sounds like good therapy.
Later,
Andrea

NEW CELL PHONE NUMBER: xxx.xxx.xxxx
Please delete the old one from any directories.

Post-email updates:

The madness continues

Well, I was starting to feel better after I was so out of it Friday and Saturday. Sunday was a good day of rest. I took Monday off to get things back in order. I was on my last pair of contacts and they were worn out -- my glasses had been in my purse. I went to the optometrist to get new contacts and glasses prescriptions. They also gave me a fresh pair of to wear. That was a relief. Thank God for the mall optometrist who saw me at the last minute. Later, I went to my first appointment with my new physician. It was great. Mostly we talked about my medical history and also about recent events. She didn't prescribe anything, but I haven't decided if I'm ok with that. Sleep is still a problem, but I'm trying to work it out. After that appointment, I went to visit the counselor. She was sort of helpful and eased some of my concerns. Post Traumatic Stress. She wants me to go to a support group. Good Lord.

So I went back to work Tuesday, yesterday. The last two days have seemed close to normal. Busy yes, but no drama. Whew!

Until today. Shit! Why can't this stop ?!?! At 4:00 my good friend / coworker Christina got canned. It was horrid. It was so out of the blue and weird and watching her pack up her desk (which was next to mine) was really hard. After she went downstairs with the boss, I burst into tears. Its the first time I cried in a while. It was definately a self-pity cry. Christina was wanting to leave anyway, and I couldn't be too sad on her behalf. But for me, its a loss, and its emotional, and its stressful, and the ramifications are going to impact me directly. And I just cried because I'm so frickin tired of it all.

I can't believe this is really my life!!!!! Gawd I miss Seattle.

ROBBERY LINKS:

3/18/2005 Rash Of Tulsa Armed Robberies Continues
This is a link to a report about the robberies on the night I got hit.  The facts are wrong...I was the first one, then the guy who was shot at was during my statement with the cop a few minutes later.

3/19/2005 A Spree Of Saturday Morning Robberies

3/21/2005 Series Of Armed Robberies Continues In Tulsa

3/22/2005 Armed Robbery Similar To Others, Police Say

3/23/2005 25 Armed Robberies In 8 Days Across Tulsa Have Police Concerned picture of villain!

As long as these fuckers are loose, I'm not going to feel safe. No matter how hard I try to reason with myself.